INESSA'S JOURNAL

The other day I came across a simple illustration of a tree, and it stayed with me.

At the top, above the ground, it said “lust.”
That’s what you see.

But underneath the surface—hidden where no one looks—there were roots. And next to those roots, it pointed to something deeper: rejection. Wounds. The real source.

And it made me pause.

Because so often in life, we focus on what is visible. The behavior. The habit. The pattern. We try to fix what’s on the surface, thinking that’s where the problem is.

But it’s not.

What you see is only the fruit.
The real issue lives in the root.

⸻

We label things quickly.

Sin. Struggle. Weakness.

But rarely do we stop and ask, where is this coming from?

Because most of the time, it doesn’t start where it shows up.

A pattern doesn’t begin as a pattern.
It begins as a seed.

And that seed is often planted in a moment:

• a moment of rejection
• a moment of pain
• a moment where something inside of you felt unseen, unloved, or unsafe

And instead of dealing with the root, we try to manage the fruit.

We say, “I need more discipline.”
“I need to try harder.”
“I need to fix this behavior.”

But you can cut a tree at the surface over and over again—and if the root is still there, it will grow back.

Every time.

⸻

And this is where real healing begins.

Not in behavior management.
But in honest reflection.

Asking God,
“Where did this start?”

Not in a condemning way—but in a way that invites truth.

Because God is not after just modifying your внешнее (outward life).
He is after restoring what’s hidden.

The root.

⸻

Sometimes what looks like lust… is actually a search for connection.
Sometimes what looks like control… is actually fear.
Sometimes what looks like distance… is actually protection from past hurt.

And if we only deal with what we see, we will miss what actually needs healing.

⸻

This is why some battles feel like cycles.

Because we’re fighting the fruit,
while feeding the root.

But when God begins to reveal the root, everything changes.

Because now you’re not just trying to “stop something”—
you’re allowing Him to heal something.

And healing goes deeper than behavior ever can.

⸻

There is a level of freedom that doesn’t come from trying harder.

It comes from being honest enough to look beneath the surface.

To sit with God and say,
“Show me what’s really there.”

And trusting that whatever He reveals,
He is also ready to restore.

⸻

If I could leave you with one thought, it would be this:

Don’t just fight what you see—ask God to reveal what’s underneath. Because the real transformation doesn’t happen when you cut the fruit, it happens when He heals the root. And when the root is restored, the fruit will change naturally.